What do South Carolina Governor Mark Sanford (pictured left), former Senator John Ensign, Reverend Jimmy Swaggert, Kobe Bryant, A-Rod, Jude Law, Governor Elliot Spitzer and former President Bill Clinton all have in common? If you said they all fell victim to “the curse”, you’re absolutely correct. The curse dates back to the biblical period, when Eve told Adam, “C’mon baby. How much harm can one, teeny-weeny, little bite do?” The moral floodgates have pretty much opened up ever since then, and men continue to fuck themselves up to this very day in their quest to obtain “the three pees”: power, prestige and pussy.
Celebrated men like Los Angeles Lakers superstar Kobe Bryant have been able to salvage their careers and offset the curse by doing things like buying “Wifey” a ridiculously expensive ring and humbling themselves in front of the national and international media. These are the guys who, for whatever reason, have refused to let the curse take complete hold of them. They allowed themselves to be subjected to the trappings often associated with success, but they also acted quickly to correct the situation and seek redemption. Others, like Baker, Swaggert, Spitzer and Clinton, had their legacies destroyed and were severely rebuked by the masses because of their incessant desire for the three pees.
Spitzer and Clinton, and others of their ilk, seemed to believe obtaining the first two pees automatically entitled you to the third; which is what ultimately led to their downfall. Their egos went into overdrive and they began to function on primal urges, as opposed to their moral compass. Ladies, here’s the bad news. In some cases, men only need obtain a smidgen of success in order to become a statistic. You want proof? Just ask yourself these two questions. How many women do you know, yourself included, whose husbands or long-term boyfriends “changed” after receiving a job promotion, notoriety or some type of award? How many of them ended up, or are now in the process of, filing for divorce or leaving their boyfriend because their significant other fell victim to the curse and cheated? If any of you can name at least two women, I’ve proved my point.
Now, some women may respond to this piece by saying, “All men cheat! It doesn’t matter if he has power or prestige. If he has a chance to nail someone, he will. All men are dogs!” The G-Man would counter by asking one simple question. If all men are dogs, what does that make the women who choose to lie down with them, especially if they know the man is involved in some type of relationship? The argument could indeed be made that cheating is part of the male condition, but that isn’t the focus of this article. The point I’m making is that when men achieve a level of success that presents extreme wealth, recognition and an assortment of gorgeous women, they are likely to fall victim. The only thing that will save them is having the foresight and moral center to understand what is actually happening. If they’re somehow able to uphold these attributes, it becomes much easier to understand why the wives and girlfriends of disgraced men are often present during those humiliating press conferences.
New York Yankees superstar Alex Rodriguez was also "cursed". His wife Cynthia stated that he kept company with many women during the course of their marriage, which ended in divorce. Music icon Madonna was one of the women the slugger kept very late hours with. Rodriguez gave a whole new meaning to the name "A-Rod".
I can hear all the men out there throwing beer cans, shot glasses and blow-up dolls at their computer and yelling, “What the hell is The G-Man doing? He’s breaking the ‘Man Law’ codes and selling us out!” If guys are mad, then they’re probably in a relationship and doing something they shouldn’t be doing. So don’t shoot the messenger. If they’re pissed now, they’ll probably go into convulsions over the next little ditty I’m about to drop on you lovely ladies out there. Some men totally operate in reverse regarding the curse. The fact that they’re able to fuck a multitude of women, at any given time, gives them an enormous sense of power and prestige. This applies to both married and single men, and if anyone wants to challenge me on this I’ll refer them to the latest divorce stats, which cites cheating by a spouse, usually the male, as the number one reason for the dramatic increase in over the last 10 years.
The power, in this regard, comes from devising and successfully executing a plan to get the panties, which ultimately boils down to the manipulation, domination and conquest of the female species. Prestige is acquired as a result of where the woman ranks in the social order. In other words, the conquest is likely to have far greater sexual impact and meaning if he has an opportunity to spend the night with a celebrity, a stripper or a “Victoria’s Secret” model/salesperson, as opposed to an average housewife with three kids or a local librarian. Sorry, no disrespect intended to housewives or librarians. So, sometimes the curse works in the reverse. However, any way you look at it, the three pees will always have the capacity to destroy men regardless of their place in society.
Governor Mark Sanford photo source: http://www.scgovernor.com/news/photos/
Author: South Carolina Governor's Office
Alex Rodriguez photo source: Alex Rodriguez
Author: Keith Allison from Baltimore, USA